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Before You Say I Love You - Read This ...

Congratulations! It's great to be in love. However, here are few words of caution. We suggest to introspect the followings, before you whisper these (I love you !) magical words into his/her ears.

- Ensure it's not infatuation, lust or for that matter simplly the attraction of opposite sex.

- They say love is blind. O.K. But would'nt you like to be happy instead of hurting yourself and others later, just because you did'nt see (or blissfully ignored the facts !) many abnormalities of the match, personality or behaviour ?

- Listen to your gut feeling. Ignore what your heart says. Even head may be manupulative/deceptive at times. - Trust the old saying ... Love is selfless ... you're always in the mindset to give, give and give ... if truly in love.

- If you feel that all the above make sense and find true in your context, then do'nt waste a second ... go ... say I love you to your beloved ... with gifts, roses and cards.

Although no reason is required to tell your partner that you love him/her so much - Listed below are few magical words your love would love to hear. Tell them these things in person...or...in a little personalized note.

1) I love your smile. First thing in the morning I wish to see is your smile.

2) I love the way you romance.

3) I love the way we can talk for hours on the phone and still carve for more.

4) I love the way you make me laugh.

5) I love how you're always there for me.

6) I love the way you look at me.

7) I love all the little things you do for me.

8) I love knowing that you'd do anything for me.

9) I love knowing that you could've dated anybody else, but went after me. Thanks for making me feel so special for myself.

10) I love how you always try to cheer me up when I'm feeling down.

Romance should be a key part of every relationship. It helps deepen your intimacy towards each other and helping you to fall in love with your mate. As a consequence, planning for a date should be romantic also. Much debate has gone on and continues nowadays about what is a romantic date, and what really is romantic date, for every one views romance differently. The differences not only exist between men and women, but each woman and each man also has their own idea about what really is romantic date. Actually, a romantic date is not simply about
flowers, candy, or kisses, but it’s the attitude of love that motivates you to give those things. Even if you may think you don’t have a romantic bone in your body, you will be surprised
at what some creative thinking can create.

Before planning a romantic date, you should first observe the simple things your partner or your partner to be does on a daily basis. What food your partner likes to eat, what are his/her favorite colors and even the smallest things that make your partner smile. We seldom take these small matter for granted yet they can be very well use to our advantage. Ideas for a romantic date depends upon several wonderful little surprises, but what’s important is you are doing it for the one you love; you wanted him/her to feel that there is something special about her/him why you are doping such things. You are doing something romantic and special because you wanted to express something for her, and you’d be expecting good result out of your romantic date. Sometimes though, we tend to think and realize that organizing and planning a romantic and perfect date is not that simple, different types and characters of each people are one to be considered in making this romantic date into action.

At this point, there are certain tips and idea for a romantic date from which you can choose from. You just have to be creative and interested in the activity for you and your partner to have a romantic date. An old but cherished favorite romantic date idea is to give her flowers first. Not one person can say that they haven’t blushed when someone’s ordered a pretty bunch of flowers and hand them delivered. Together with note on the card expressing your feelings, she’ll surely go with you for a date. Another great tip for a romantic date is to invite her for a dinner, not from the restaurant but to a very solemn and romantic place, with the food you cooked. Though you may not be a culinary expert, he/she will just love you for trying. Those are just examples of romantic date ideas, but there are other tips for a romantic date that will really sweep her off her feet.

On the other hand, romantic dates are not only for people dating but for married people also. Though married people are busy with functions, kids, work, and friends, they should never neglect their partners. An ideal romantic date is a beach picnic under a full moon and the stars are gazing through the skies, walking while holding hands, you can do this together with your kids. Going out together to see an orchestral concert or a play will also work. Getting close to one another or anything that involves romantic things is actually considered romantic. If your date is the typical sports fanatic, you may take her to her favorite sport, a baseball or hockey game of her favorite team perhaps is another typical romantic date idea. With these tips and ideas, you’ll surely have a romantic date.

Asking someone out on a date is not rocket science, but for some people it can be very overwhelming, especially when asking somebody out for the first time. By following the tips below you can help increase the odds of getting a YES when asking someone out on a date.

1. For starters you should wait for a relaxing environment when asking someone out for a date. Never make that move in a tense environment. You don't want to come across as tense or stressed out. You want to appear calm and confident. It's important that everything should just flow smoothly.

2. Do not pop the question out of nowhere. The conversation should naturally lead into asking someone out for a date. For example, it would be ideal for both of you to have just finished talking about something that you both are interested in which brings comfortability and then an "Oh by the way..." is a perfect opportunity to ask for a date.

3. Be sure that when you ask out somebody for a date try to do something that you enjoy doing and are good at. This will increase your confidence both when asking them out on the date and during the actual date. Confidence attracts people towards you.

4. If you did get that first date then your next job is doing all of the right things to get the second date, right? So while on that first date, be sure to have the attitude of giving rather than getting. Try to involve activities that he or she would enjoy. Do your best to create the date around them, showing your attention, and making them feel special.

5. Last but not least, just be yourself when asking him or her out on a date. Do not try to act like someone else or pull those one liners. Trust me, being original works every time!

Have you ever thought of meeting people online? If so, meeting people online can be great fun. Online dating has given us the opportunity from our comforts of our own home to search for that someone. Let your common sense prevail when searching online and do not let your instincts lessen when making your decision. Please see the dating tips below which will make your search safe, a lot of fun and most importantly successful.

Dating Tip #1
Most common form of introduction would be to say" Please Allow me to introduce myself" I use this one myself, it helps to break the ice and it is polite yet confident.

Have you ever tried to introduce yourself in a night club or abar? I am sure you have. Do you say "Hi my name is"... my telephone number and my address is such and such... No I thought not. When you introduce yourself on http://Iwantudating.com, please use common sense and do not reveal any personal details about yourself. This is one great thing about online dating. Take as much time as you need in getting to know someone before being comfortable enough in revealing all there is to know about you. So make sure you are not pressured.

Dating Tip #2
Do not lie about yourself on your profile. People will eventually find out you are having them on.

Dating Tip #3
Do take the time to complete the entire profile on the registration form - Any unanswered questions say you could not be bothered or are hiding something. Try and complete the form as much as possible to let any potential contact know the real you.

Dating Tip #4
Have you ever heard of the phrase "Honesty is the best policy" I am sure you have. Honesty is admired yet dishonesty is being disrespectful. Tell the people you are emailing your true intentions and it should be the correct path to successful dating. Always remember, that you must use your common sense and judgement. I know it is not easy to judge who you are contacting on the other side so please assess who you are being honest with.

Dating Tip #5
Now here is good dating advice. Add a nice photo. A photo of you. A smiling photo. A smiling photo up close. A recent smiling photo up close! Make sure your photos are recent preferably less than 6 months old) and that you are happy. Members with photos are likely to get up to 9 times more replies than members without any photo image attached to their profile.

Dating Tip #6
Do not talk or brag about your ex. There is nothing more of a turn off for people to hear about your previous relationships. Instead focus on what you already have. The past is often best forgotten.

Dating Tip #7
Always try and reply to people's messages and reply in a reasonable amount of time, not weeks later. If you are serious about dating, you are serious about replying. They have taken the time to talk or write to you and they may be really nice.

Dating Tip #8
Has it ever happened to you where you are talking to a stranger and you are wondering what they look like? Our brains tend to create an image in our mind of what someone might look like. It is only our natural instinct to do so. If you ever meet or met the person they did not look anything like you had in your mind? Am I right? Of Course. Unfortunately none of us are
psychic so I suggest you you ask for a picture and you can feel more comfortable with whom you are emailing.

Dating Tip #9
Always and I mean always meet your date in a mutual place during the day which both of you are comfortable with. Always advise a friend or a relative of where you are going and leave a contact number. Do not leave any Drinks unattended. Unfortunately and it must be said that we live in cruel and sick world. Please if you have an alcoholic drink then please drink moderately.

Dating Tip #10
Be Realistic. Most fairytale stories do not have a happy ending. If they sound perfect fit , it does not necessarily mean send the wedding Invitations out yet. If this date does not work out do not worry it will not be your last first date. If it does not lead to a next date then pack your bags and move on to the next potential candidate on your list. Do not be put off.

Remember there are plenty of fish in the Sea. So make sure you choose wisely.

"How can I know when I'm really in love?" asked Ruby, a client of mine. "How can I know if what I feel for Jim is really love or just infatuation? How can I know if this feeling will last?"

Ruby and Jim had been dating for 11 months and were considering marriage. Ruby, 32, felt "head over heels" in love with Jim, but she had felt head over heels in love with Adam, as well as with Mark.

"That feeling didn't last with Adam or Mark. How do I know it will last with Jim? How can you tell when it's the real thing?"

"Ruby," I told her, "the answer to this important question depends upon which part of you feels `in love' and which part of Jim you are `in love' with."

I explained to Ruby that she can be in love from her ego, or as we call it in the Inner Bonding process we teach, her wounded self. Or, she can be in love from her true Self or core Self - her essence, her soul Self. If she is in love from her wounded self, it will be about external things and the love will not last. But if she is in love from her soul Self, it will be about internal things, and it is very likely that the love will see her through all the challenges that come up in relationships.

"Ruby," I asked her, "What do you love about Jim?"

"I've been thinking about that a lot," she answered. "It's kind of funny some of the things I love about him. I love his walk and his smell. I love the way his eyes crinkle when he smiles, and I love his laugh. I love just being next to him. There is something about his energy - I don't quite know how to talk about it – that I love being around. I love his touch. I love his kindness and sensitivity and his deep caring for people. Even though he would not be considered a handsome man, I love how he looks. There's something about his mouth and the look in his eyes that just fills me with love. And I love the passion he has about both his work and his hobbies I love his playfulness. We laugh a lot together. "

"How is this different than what you loved about Adam or Mark?"

"I think that with both Adam and Mark I was pretty much blown away by their looks – they were both hunks. Both of them were also very successful and very social. They took me to nice places and great vacations. Jim is not as financially successful nor as social, yet I feel much safer with him. I think that I also feel in love with Adam's power in the world. He really seemed to have it together and his sense of power turned me on. But he wasn't always nice to people, and he wasn't always nice to me."

"So it seems that with Adam and Mark, your wounded self was in love with their wounded selves – their more superficial qualities of looks, money and power. But it sounds like with Jim your essence is in love with his essence. The qualities you say you are in love with are qualities that won't go away over time, because they are soul qualities. People can certainly lose their looks and their money, but it is unlikely that Jim will lose the qualities that you love in him, especially if you frequently express your appreciation
for these qualities."

"So I really am in love with Jim! This really is different than my other relationships. You know, I think I've finally grown up. The more superficial qualities just don't seem to be so attractive to me anymore!"

Today, sitting in my pink armchair, reading about how a world-famous medium was able to communicate with the spirit world and our physical world and end the grief of those who had been left behind, I became even more aware of how love is the central theme of the universe itself. This was what the departed passed on to those who remained on earth. Their major regret was that they had not loved or expressed their love when they were alive.

When Jesus said that "he who loves me shall not perish" what did he mean?

Since death is not real, the Soul being eternal, what does he mean? I like to imagine that he means the end of the process of suffering unlovingness. For to be unloved is a kind of death. Once a soul gets that it is the Allness, lovingness happens spontaneously, because the Beloved is expressing Itself.

The Light and Love are one and the same. In fact, it is the Light that is loving through us when we feel love.

Human love is conditioned by want. The soul, mistaking itself for the ego, the mind, and the body, seeks to possess and to own the object of desire. It seeks almost to want to absorb it into itself so that it can be greater. In romantic love, for example, the lover seeks approval, safety, and control. Wealth and beauty and charm increase the attributes of the lover because the ego of the other wants it for itself.

Parental love is purer, although now there is a desire for the child to exemplify the qualities and values of the parent.

Animal love for its owner is almost completely spontaneous.

When a dog delights in his master's presence, or when cat purrs at the touch of your hand, this is probably as pure a love you can find in everyday life. There is no cunning in this love, no projection of future gain, no thought about manipulating the lover. The love is spontaneous, pure, and a simple appreciation of the moment.

Finally, the ultimate love is when one can love for the other what the other wants for him or herself. This now starts to blend into transcendental love, and we begin to love others the way I imagine God loves us. Love for its own sake, because that is who we are and because the grace in the other is so obvious to us.

I agree with Socrates who says, "It is love alone that unites the soul with God."

St. Teresa said, "What matters is not to think much but to love much."

In the words of the famous philosopher and the cherished saint, we find a great mystery revealed.

Here we touch upon the entire fabric of life, which is, in my opinion, a spiritual journey. Beyond what we think about life, there is the way of the heart, which is spontaneous and pure before it becomes sullied with too much
analysis.

What the heart wants is to return Home to the arms of the Beloved. It does this by feeling what the Beloved feels, unconditional loving.

Allow me to finish these reflections with a quote from the Brihad-Aranyaka Upanishad: It summarizes most eloquently what I have been fumbling to say in this brief essay.

“It is not for the love of a husband that a husband is dear; but for the love of the Soul in the husband that is dear.

“It is not for the love of a wife that a wife is dear; but for the love of the Soul in the wife that is dear.

“It is not for the love of children that children are dear; but for the love of the Soul in children that is dear.

“It is not for the love of all that all is dear; but for the love of the Soul in all that is dear.”

The book of life, I contend, is the story of Light and Love. It is a love story between the unmanifest and the manifest; a story about the relationship between God and Soul. And when the Soul reciprocates to the love of the Divine, the earth journey concludes with a contented sigh.

Love is like the gold ore that is brought up from the earth; it is mixed with other metals (emotions, needs, and fears). Our job is to purify that gold as we seek to love unconditionally in all of our relationships, regardless of the others’ behaviors. Only then we will be truly happy.

1. On the first level, we "love" the other because he or she offers us security. If he or she stops offering us this security or starts offering it to others, we are very likely to feel hurt, angry and jealous. Thus, our love is based on the condition of this specific agreement that the other will provide us the feeling of security. When we say to this person, "I love you," what we actually mean is, "I need you in order to feel secure. I feel insecure without you."

2. At the second level, we "love" the other because he or she provides us with various forms of pleasure, comfort or satisfaction. If he or she stops providing these pleasures to us or offers them to others, we lose our feelings of "love" and often feel hurt, anger and bitter. When we say to this person, "I love you," what we really mean is, "I love the pleasure you
give me."

3. At the third level, we "love" the other because he or she, in some way, affirms us, perhaps by obeying us, needing us, agreeing with us, or praising us. If this changes, our feelings change. We need this person in order to feel our power or self worth.

4. At the fourth level, we begin for the first time to experience selfless love for a person regardless of how he or she behaves. There is still, however, the condition that this is a specific person, usually a child or parent. We love this person even if he or she doesn’t provide us with security, satisfaction or affirmation, but we do not feel this for all persons.

5. Then at the fifth level, we begin to feel universal selfless love in which we love more and more people unconditionally, regardless of how they behave. At this level, we are often motivated to participate in some type of social work serving those in need.

6. At the sixth level, we experience spiritual love where our love is for the soul that is temporarily expressing itself through the personality. We are not attached to the personality and are not fearful concerning its various changing states, including death, for we realize that the body and personality are not the real being, but simply instruments of expression.

7. At the level of divine love, we no longer experience separateness from anyone. We are the consciousness in all beings around us. There is the experience of total unity with all. Jesus Christ was experiencing this Divine love when he said, "I am in you and you are in me. I am in the Father and the Father is in me."

Age does not protect you from love but love to some extent protects you from age.
- Jeanne Moreau

There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved.
- George Sand

Romantic love remembers what pleases a woman, what excites her, and what surprises her. Its actions whisper: you are the most special person in my life.
- Charles Stanley

Love is a never ending feeling.
- Adeil Prince

Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth.
- John Lyly

Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
- Lisa Hoffman

Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness.
-Oliver WendellHolmes

To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides.
- David Viscott

When you love someone, all your saved-up wishes start coming out.
- Elizabeth Bowen

Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner.
- Amy Bloom

The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman's heart.
- Josiah G. Holland

Love feels no burden, thinks nothing of trouble, attempts what is above its strength, pleads no excuse of impossibility... It is therefore able to undertake all things, and it completes many things, and warrants them to take effect, where he who does not love would faint and lie down. Love is watchful and sleeping, slumbereth not. Though weary, it is not tired; though pressed, it is not straitened; though alarmed, it is not confounded...
- Thomas A. Kempis

Love is like a violin. The music may stop now and then, but the strings remain forever.
- Unknown

Love is not blind - It sees more and not less, but because it sees more it is willing to see less.
- Will Moss

Love is always open arms. If you close your arms about love you will find that you are left holding only yourself.
- Leo Buscaglia

Happiness is the china shop; love is the bull.
- H. L. Mencken

Love is, above all, the gift of oneself.
- Jean Anouilh

Love is like the sun coming out of the clouds and warming your soul.
- Unknown

Love is an act of endless forgiveness
A tender look which becomes a habit.
- Peter Ustinov

We never forget those who make us blush.
- Jean-François De La Harpe

Young love is from the earth, and late love is from heaven.
- Turkish Proverb

Tell me whom you love and I will tell you who you are.
- Houssaye

Love is a largely unconscious reaction, an awakening of the psycho-physiological (mind-body) system that runs virtually all aspects of our lives on a daily basis.

Love is happiness and happiness is love.

To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer.

Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.

We always return to our first loves.Sometimes I find myself making love to my own misfortune - Norma O. Abrego

Love is not blind -- it simply enables one to see things others fail to see - Anonymous

Love is all we have, the only way that each can help the other. - Eurpides

Love lives in cottages as well as in court. - English proverb

I like not only to be loved, but to be told that I am loved. - George Elliot

Faults are thick where love is thin - English Proverb

A love song is just a caress set to music. - Sigmund Romberg

There is nothing more important in life than love. - Barbara Streisand

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